Spirit of the Law: Chanukah #11

(Kitzur Shulchan Aruch 139:11) “The custom of lighting is as follows: on the first night, one lights the candle which is furthest to the right. On the second night, one adds a second candle and lights the new candle and moving towards the right, lights the candle at the far right. On each night one adds a candle more to the left and lights that first. He then proceeds from left to right.”
Rav Nachman of Tcherin wrote in his Nachas Hashulchan, zt”l, that this halachah relates to the first lesson in Likutei Moharan, where Rebbe Nachman of Breslov teaches that one must search for the “intellect” within everything in order to come closer to Hashem. We must contemplate deeply into every situation and realize in a deep place that this situation was tailor made for me by the Creator. For this reason, I can come close to Hashem through anything. If one merits this understanding, he will feel incredible illumination and be able to elevate anything to Hashem. However, since the light of true understanding is very great, one can only receive it through constriction. This means that the light of true understanding comes to one slowly, level by level. I may know that I must overcome a certain weakness but that alone will not help me do it. I have to progress slowly, step by step, until I have achieved my goal. Sometimes this can take many years.
It is well known that Rav Yisrael Salanter, zt”l, said that it is easier to learn through the entire Talmud than to truly master a bad character trait. Many people feel discouraged when they hear this. However, the truth is that one who thinks about it will be very encouraged by this statement. We all know that it is impossible to finish Shas in a few months, or even a few years, of hard effort (at least for the first time)—and that such accelerated study usually means that the material hasn’t been learned in depth. So too, we must realize that it is impossible to overcome our negative character traits overnight with some sort of quick-fix solution.
Reb Nosson, zt”l, said that one who breaks a bad character trait is left with two! Rav Yisroel of Ruzhin also made a similar statement and explained that the two are the original, in addition to a new dose of arrogance, since the person mistakenly believes that he has overcome the bad inside of him. The way one overcomes a bad character trait is by yearning to change and praying about it and searching for advice about how to change it. This way, one slowly takes in the understanding necessary for lasting change. This is the concept of constricting one’s understanding. One has a lot of patience and does his best, realizing that any real change comes only from the Almighty. We must do our part but we must remember that “Hashem is not a tyrant.” Improving our character takes time because that is the Creator’s will. In the meantime, we keep starting over until the correct time for the change comes.
This is the reason why one orders the candles from right to left in the menorah, but lights from left to right. We start with whatever understanding we can take in (from the right) and slowly overcome the bad (which is represented by the left side) with our ever increasing understanding. The truth is that there are two other opinions brought in the Mishnah Berurah regarding which candle to start with and what the meaning of “all of your turnings should be to the right.” The common denominator is that all agree that you start with the right which represents the light of understanding. As the verse says, “The heart of the wise one is to his right.” Then one overcomes the challenges that were originally generated by acting without the light of understanding. Slowly we increase the light, adding one candle a night, as we steadily rectify our bad tendencies a little at a time.